04 December, 2011

Five From Emo

Today a depart a bit from my usual humorous story and offer a few tidbits from Emo Philips. Enjoy.


· When I was a kid, I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized, the Lord doesn't work that way. So I just stole one and asked Him to forgive me ... and I got it!

· So I'm at the wailing wall, standing there like a moron, with my harpoon."

· A Mormon told me that they don't drink coffee. I said, "A cup of coffee every day gives you wonderful benefits." He said, "Like what?" I said, "Well, it keeps you from being Mormon ..."

· I'm not Catholic, but I gave up picking my belly button for lint.

· When I was a kid, my dad would say, "Emo, do you believe in the Lord?" I'd say, "Yes!" He'd say, "Then stand up and shout Hallelujah!" So I would ... and I'd fall out of the roller coaster.